Does A Happy Ending Massage Count As Cheating?

Whether you intend it to be or not, receiving a deep-tissue massage while having a stranger stroke your nude body can be quite se*ual. It’s possible for your massage therapist to accidently rub your butt in a way that makes you think of a previous se*ual encounter, or you could simply find yourself attracted to being naked and covered up. It occurs. Then there are the massages that are designed to be seductive and end in a se*ual act or with a “happy ending.” What does it matter if you choose one of those while you’re dating? Do you cheat? It mostly depends.

According to Logan Levkoff, PhD, an AASECT-certified se* educator and relationship expert, “nothing counts as adultery, and everything counts as infidelity if your spouse and you are not on the same page with what counts as a betrayal.” According to Dr. Levkoff, you and your partner may already be aware of how effectively having transactional experiences outside of your partnership works. However, because every relationship is unique, it can be challenging to define what infidelity is and isn’t until you really discuss it.

According to certified psychotherapist and expert in se* therapy Michael Guichet, LMFT, infidelity “comes up in our life like a landmine.” It would be simpler if we had the language or the courage to have these discussions about what infidelity and cheating are in our relationships. Sorry, but that happy ending massage would be viewed as cheating if you and your partner think that receiving se*ual enjoyment from someone else is not appropriate. You may, however, determine that you both agree that it is something you can live with. Unless you’re avoiding the topic of conversation and skulking around, there is no right or wrong response.

So begin the conversation. Clinical se* therapist Shannon Chavez, PsyD, advises entering the dialogue with honesty and openness. Your partner will notice this and get worried if you approach the situation with the belief that you have done something wrong. The objective is not to persuade children that this is appropriate behaviour, she claims. “Talking about it and addressing how to investigate satisfying these desires inside the partnership is important.”

According to Logan Levkoff, PhD, an AASECT-certified se* educator and relationship expert, “Nothing counts as adultery, and everything counts as infidelity if your spouse and you are not on the same page with what counts as a betrayal.” According to Dr. Levkoff, you and your partner may already be aware of how effectively having transactional experiences outside of your partnership works. However, because every relationship is unique, it can be challenging to define what infidelity is and isn’t until you really discuss it.
According to certified psychotherapist and expert in se* therapy Michael Guichet, LMFT, infidelity “comes up in our life like a landmine.” It would be simpler if we had the language or the courage to have these discussions about what infidelity and cheating are in our relationships. Sorry, but that happy ending massage would be viewed as cheating if you and your partner think that receiving se*ual enjoyment from someone else is not appropriate. You may, however, determine that you both agree that it is something you can live with. Unless you’re avoiding the topic of conversation and skulking around, there is no right or wrong response.
So begin the conversation. Clinical se* therapist Shannon Chavez, PsyD, advises entering the dialogue with honesty and openness. Your partner will notice this and get worried if you approach the situation with the belief that you have done something wrong. The objective is not to persuade children that this is appropriate behaviour, she claims. “Talking about it and addressing how to investigate satisfying these desires inside the partnership is important.”

According to Guichet, role playing or fantasy games are excellent ways to learn more about your partner’s perspective on such matters. He advises that after telling your spouse that you’d love to explore a dream involving se work, you should just ask them what they think generally about se* work or happy ending massages. It’s safer to engage someone in conversation by trying to understand their viewpoints because you can observe their reaction, the author claims.

Alternatively, Dr. Levkoff advises that you inquire with your partner about any instances in which a massage turned into a se*ual encounter. Either “Yes, and it was amazing” or “No, I would never do that” are possible responses. Then, she advises, you may confess to your partner that you’ve always wondered what that’s like and are considering acquiring one. This enables you to have more in-depth discussions about your relationship’s boundaries, she explains.

Dr. Levkoff emphasises that there is a significant distinction between purposefully seeking a massage that results in se*ual fulfilment and unintentionally having one. Some people could encounter an unexpected happy ending and, unsure of how to inform their partner about it, choose to tell a lie instead. According to Dr. Chavez, “it creates issues in the relationship about being genuine and transparent about your se*uality.” “There are greater problems in the relationship that need to be addressed if you have to hide a portion of your se*uality out of fear, shame, or embarrassment.”

Your particular relationship dynamics will determine whether or not receiving a massage is “betrayal.”
The truth is that happy ending massages meet a need for a lot of people, just like pornography and erotica do, thus places exist for a purpose. So, discuss it. In the event that everything else fails, you may always give your partner an erotic massage and come up with a solution that pleases you both.